Team of The Time #6

Thought Radetto was dead, didn't you? Prolonged slumber is where it is at kids. It is on trend right now. Just ask a bear, or a squirrel. But we are back, and you know what the first thing a bear does after hibernating through the Canadian winter? That's right, Team of the Time:

Kevin Kuranyi - Yes! It's Kuranyi time guys. The man with the finest precision beard art in all of Gelsenkirchen is delivering the goods. Goal based goods. Always well bearded, seems like a while since big Kev has been amongst the goals like this, but he is back, at the front of an improbable Schalke '04 title challenge. If Kev keeps this up, he could spell out Deutchmeister across his chiselled lower face. That is something we all want to see. The unholy meeting of hair gel, beard grooming product and German lager as Kuranyi gets dowsed during the title celebrations would be a beautiful thing to behold. Here's to it.

Cacau - Bundesliga is where it is at right now (and possibly always), and whilst the big C-man may not have the chin foliage of some of the leagues other strikers, he is sure scoring the goals. 7 in 3 or something. Yowzers. Cacau could mastermind the biggest champions league upset in all of history, in fact, sod it, what are the odds of him banging in the first at the Nou Camp next week, or the week after. I'll take some of that. He is even German now? Madness eh? Seriously Podolski, your gonna have to score a few for your goat clad mates to get to South Africa now Cacau has got his passport stamped. German National. German International more like.

Remember the name, Wayne Rooney - Maybee the only time Motty got something just about right eh? Anyway, amongst all the super exciting news about those Chelsea defenders which was far too exciting for words, aparently Wayne did pretty well, scored a few goals from what I here. But you allready knew that. The boy could fire us to glory, if only he didn't look so bad in a super retro shirt.

Peter Crouch - Being Peter Crouch must be pretty darn sweet. Think of all the perks. First of, the horizon is at least 3kms further away for Crouchy, simple Pythagoras says so. Plus having awesome robot dancing skills is always a bonus, even if the big man rarely unleashes them even though he ALWAYS will score goals for England. Plus he looks so damn happy when he does get one, like the kindly father figure to the whole rest of England team set up. The man will be going to South Africa, he really should. Yet there are still more reasons to envy the big man. He is so tall I doubt he can hear what bell enduous nonsense Harry Redknapp is spluttering out whilst down the Spurs training field, plus I hear his wife is a babe. Oh Crouchy....

The Whole of The J-League - Hell yes, a five a side team featuring at least 200 of Japans finest players, pus a load of naturalised Brazilians would be neigh on invincible. Could just stack dudes in the goalmouth. So the J-League kicks off this weekend, meaning all teams with the greatest names ever, and some of the best flag displays known to man, are back in action. I have no idea how my personal faves JEF United will fair. I predict well. But when Nakamura and Ono are setting the world cup alight, you are gonna wish you had paid the J-League more attention