The Best Team in the World:

Udinese.

Seriously.

They are the best football team in the whole wide world. The fact that they currently sit top of Europe's toughest domestic league (Yeah, suck on that last 16 line up) seems as good a place to start this argument. Yep, as of last time I checked, Udinese sat atop Serie A, a league with not only the most teams in the Champions League last 16, but one where those teams that have made the last 16 are struggling to break out of the upper mid table, or in Inter's case, struggling to do anything at all. You could probably spin this into a Serie A is shit argument, but as far as I can tell a team that currently sits 16th in Serie A, managed to achieve something that Manchester's big spending high flyers failed to achieve....

Anyway, back on point, Udinese are top of Serie A, and I doubt many remember, but they pushed Arsenal pretty close to the edge of the Champions League cliff. For a while back in September, until penalties started to go awry, Udinese  had Arsenal staring down the long drop the the Euopa League group stage. And this is without any Oligarch, or massive shirt sale income. When was the last time you saw an Udinese shirt in the background of the news? Never, that's when.

Yep, Udinese are a fairly small team, from a fairly small place. Udine is about as far east as you can get in Italy, pretty darn close to Slovenia and has a population of about a hundred thousand. So roughly equal to St Helens in population terms. It is not like they can rely on huge gate receipts then is it, especially when the stadium can hold a third of the towns population. And yet through some transfer market genius, so much of Europe's hot young talent has passed through this town.

Somewhat understandably, last season everyone was salivating over Alexis Sanchez. He was at the center of a team that performed miracles all season long, eventually finishing 4th. Perhaps the most miraculous part of a glorious season was a 13 game unbeaten run from January to April, when they boys from Friuli where playing some of the greatest football on the planet last season. Yeah, a thirteen game unbeaten run is great, but when it includes beating thumping champions Inter 3-1, then following that up with a 2-1 beating of Juventus at the Olimpico, leading Milan 4-3 going into the third minute of injury time (it finished 4-4), and putting 7 (seven!) past Palermo in Scilly, you know something special is happening. In those 13 games Udinese scored 34 goals. It was sensational. They possibly were the best team in the world for 3 glorious months.

But Udinese pull this sort of shit regularly. An entirely rebuilt team is doing it right now. Admittedly not with the attacking flair of last season, which was sold on for a tidy 50 million euro, but with a team built on defensive solidarity, and Anotio Di Natale's never ending ability to score loads of goals. Last time the current Best Team In The World yardstick came to Friuli, Udinese held out until the last 5 minutes before going 2 down in heartbreaking fashion. We all remember hearing Mr Richardson talk of Udinese's latest escapades over an ice cream or two. Yes, they are a selling club, but what is the problem with that if you can keep your shit together season after season (I accept there were a few wobbles, but that just adds to it). Indeed, arguably one of Italy's best players of the last 10 years, the aforementioned Mr Di Natale, has stayed heartwarmingly loyal. Why aren't more footballers like that?

But that is the thing, here in Radetto's mountain cave we prefer those who get a bit close to the sun. Yeah, Barcelona may be a really good side, but how much cash has gone into it. Yes they play amazing football at times, but it is kind of expected, especially after they signed the Zebrette's brightest star. When Udinese are pulling of equally mind bending football, it is far more joyous to behold. Late last winter was a sensational time, the plucky underdogs were at it once again. Impossible dreams of Scudetto glory were taking place. In the end it went a bit awry, but a 4th place finish lead them to Europe once again, but it is better to try and fail right? Especially when you try like the Zebrette did for those few glorious months.

I accept, they may not be winning the Champions League any time soon, but if that is your come back, you are missing the point. No one has occasionally but consistently shone like Udinese over the last few seasons.   For a team from a city of 100,00 souls, to be, even briefly playing some of the worlds most sensational football, all for the most part of its own back is sensational. You can keep your Barcelona thanks.

Team Of The Time #5

So here we are. The fifth occasional Radetto team of the time. There was talk of multi million pound transfers to other more well known, actually read by real people blogs. Alas, all were turned down, so here's what you get:

1. Luca Toni - So the transfer window has been a bit of a let down. 4 months of tabloid speculation seem to have failed to materialise. Apart from big Luca. Seems that Euro '08 somehow broke him a little bit. The million goal wurst und weissbier fan seemed to have lost his golden touch. And lets be honest, we all wanted Toni's return to triumphant. The big man teaming up with Totti again, just like that summer four long years ago. And it went so well. That smile is infectious no? DM

2. Marco Boriello - Another Italian journeyman pick. Boriello seems to have been there abouts for a good while now. After a glorious year at Genoa and a big money move to AC, you got the feeling that he would become another one of those almost guys. He had only hit double figures in two seasons ever. But things seem to be going okay in Milan. A few goals, still getting some appearances, however it is a mighty task to steal the limelight away from Filippo Inzhagi, and you have to respect the man for taking it on.18 months later, he finally did it. This was a sublime goal. First off, FIlipo would have been offside, but I doubt he could have pulled a goal out from that position without a decent amount  of elbow deflection. Boriello said he just felt the ball and that was all it took, like a Jedi. Whatever happened, he hooks that thing out of the air in a supreme fashion. Who says Serie A needed Zlatan? DM

3. Lee Chung Yong - The second most excellent bachelor in all of South Korea, Lee Young-Pyo can get bent, and Seol Ki-Hyun? Seol Ki-Hwho? Harsh, but we need to get with the times, this cat is 21 and he's already the best at football of anyone in Bolton, even when Vernon Kay goes back twice a year to visit his gran. I wish June Sarpong was still hot... And you wish your teenage/young adult/middle aged/deathbed hero of 2006, Lee Young-pyo, was still the second best South Korean player to hit the Premiership. Dead wrong, mate. Owen Coyle's reputation for 'good' football (I didn't actually WATCH Burnley games, sheesh), precedes him and this gent exactly what he needs if he's going to surmount the fact that Bolton is 4 feet deep in pies and everyone has mouths on their knees. You know readers, I get the feeling, that in time, he will play for a better club than Bolton Wanderer's FC. Everton or somebody. IJC

4. Clint Dempsey - AKA Deuce, The Human highlight reel, the Kansas City Can Opener,  AKA the winner of this months Radetto Crossbar Chubby of the Century! Fuck, who needs over a cenury of cultural immersion when you've got money athleticism and rigourously practiced technique?! You know what I always say, 'What up? The best footballers aren't bred in the streets, dude, they're made in laboratories. With a shit load of cones. Peace!' But he's gone, stolen from us by an incident that didn't make the highlight reel. But fear not ,one of his crew, The Scholarship Six (who probably also read the Guardian Sport website that day, come to think about it) has informed me he'll be back for the World Cup, just in the nick of time to net me a modest amount on a radical anti-patriotic bet: Clint to put in a lung busting performance: 200 - 1 against.

Are you seriously telling me that given the oppurtunity you WOULDN'T make a rap video? IJC

5.Boaz Myhill - Boaz is one of those keepers who inhabit the lower reaches of the premiership. The Paddy Kenny/That guys who played for Charlton type. The type who will occasionally have one heroic day in the limelight. Last weekend it was Boaz' turn. But it wasn't just the heroic clean sheet that we liked here at Radetto. It was the style of the saves. It was Deflecto-tastic 90 minutes of goalkeeping. That man wasn't gonna catch nothing. Hero. DM

Serie A Needs This Title Race

People say Serie A is in need of a recovery, it needs a title race. The English press paints a picture of a league dominated by Internazionale's euro bottlers. Scudetto after Scudetto handed out to the Nerrazurri, in acknowledgement of their somewhat disheartening ability to grind out the results despite the best efforts of the peninsula's provencial heroes, the whole season leading to an inevitable blue and black glory. That seems a little harsh to me. Serie A has not been far off its late 90's saturday morning best. Luciano Spaletti aided by that boy Totti took the fight to Inter for three years. Roma coming within 45 minutes of the title 2 short seasons ago, and getting the better of Inter in the Coppa Italia thrice in a row.

What Serie A has lacked is a genuine, season long battle for the crown. One of those ones that really gets juicy round about the end of January. Thing is, this season, as of right now, Serie A is looking pretty darn juicy. Something imprtant is about to happen amongst the towers of San Siro. Lets just get this straight; If AC beat Inter, they will be three behind with a game in hand, and fingers crossed, they can push Inter all the way through untill June.

But there is more to it that that. A title fight between AC and Inter has so, so many plus points, but with this AC, and this Inter, it would be wonderous to behold. Inter have become the immovable object of the Italian game post Calciopoli. No matter what happens they will be at the top come the end of the season. They invested heavily, and if I am honest pretty awesomely over the summer, bringing in Diego Millito and Wesley Schneider, thus satisfying Radetto's cool sulky Argentinian and genius Dutchman criteria. This is a more likable Inter squad than any of the previous four, the fact that they seem to be more falliable than previous seasons just adds to it.

And then there is AC. The antithesis of Inter's 'churning out the reults' play. This is a team containing masters of the sublime pass; Beckham and Pirlo, and the darting adventurous play of Alex Pato that undid Real Madrid not so long ago, not to mention the skills a motivated Ronaldinho can call upon. With Alex Nesta back at the back and in commanding form, along with Thiago Silva, Abbate and Antoninni Milan look formidable at the back for the first time in years. Hell, these guys are even presenting a goalscoring threat, and lets be honest, no one was expecting that. With Gattuso as commanding as ever as well as Boriello and that man Filippo Inzhagi adding not insignificant contributions to the cause I think the majority of Italy's calcio fans are dreaming of an upset this weekend. It really is a classic Mourinho, football by numbers side up against the Leonardo's opportunistic and of late prolific free spirits. Just look at the highlights from the Juve and Sienna games.

So yeah, if AC get the result this weekend Milan, and Serie A as a whole are in for one hell of a 2nd half of the year. Silky skills against solidarity, sulbilme passes against percentage play. Sod it, I can even bring myself to commit good against bad to words. But Inter are hella cool bad guys. Hell, Ranieri's happy go lucky Roma are not too far back, and Toni is back among the goals. Oh Mr Richardson, how my saturday morning need you now.

Fuelling the Market

Transfer rumours? Seems like Sergio Aguero can mention something about not going to Chelsea, and boom, it's all over the place. Ageuro £40 million pound raid, Aguero wants Chelsea, yada yada yada. Seems like these stories can come from nowhere, so here at Radetto we are going to try and improve things and push through transfers we would like to see, through rumour mongering alone. I mean, we totally have our ear to the failed agent corpse laden floor of the transfer market. We totally know some stuff you don't. So yeah, spread these rumours round kids. We can make football a better place.

Pazzini & Cassano to Juventus - I mean c'mon, this would rule. Just think, come febuary next year, Drogba makes his way through the Tuscan night, but runs into a supreme Chielini challenge. Chielini dinks it back to Buffon. Gianluca pauses, checks his headscarfe thing, and generally looks supremely cool, before lacing a pass out Diego. Diego runs forward before threading it out to Cassano, draped in the Biancolesti stripes, who procedes to dink and trick his way forward towards the box. A blur of begloved wonderment. Just when you think he is done for, he laces the pass back across the box to Diego, who eyes up the shot. But No! a sublime fake out cross glaces of the head of Pazzini and past Cech's grasp. Juve make the quarters, the old lady is back. Buffon - Chielini - Diego - Giovinco - Pazzini - Cassano - Del Piero etc would rule. I would buy FIATs for life. This was written before Bayernfest im Turin. Even more reason for them to get on the case.

Bojan Krkic to Arsenal. Imagine how supreme Arsenal would be if they didn't have to rely on Bendtner every other week. Senior Krkic, possibly the least Spanish sounding Spaniard ever, is the Radetto approved solution. First of, imagine Motty or Pearce trying to get their gobs round that name. It goes K - R - K for christs sake. But anyhoom. I like Bojan, he scored a few in Spain and could sort out the Arsenal striker situation. In the mighty Toon's absence, I think Arsenal would be a supreme home for the lad.

Sol Campbell to Anywhere but the Toon. FOR CHRISTS SAKE NO. The best defence in the Championship does not need Sol. Sheesh

Edin Dzeko to AC Milan. AC are getting there act togethor. Leonardo is going to bring them round. I can feel it. Now think how sweet it would be to see Leo at the head of a team with Alex Pato and Edin up front. AC would have one of the greatest striker combos on earth. With Pirlo in behind them they could cut sublime shapes all across the San Siro turf. Beautiful. Dzecks has allready said he would prefer Italy to the premiership, and no doubt AC are keen on him. He would help put AC a few more points on the board, and put the glamour back into Serie A again.

Robert Green to the Big Four. Give the lad a chance. This fella is good. Just give the man a chance. Yes, there was that England gaffe, but he didn't have much choice really. I blame Rio. Is it only me that sees the ideal replacement for Van Der Saar in this man's steely gaze? Plus he looks good in the British Racing Green of the England goalkeeper kit

Who Ate All The (Glory) Pies?

Antonio Cassano should be one of the best players in the world, but I think I prefer his career the way he has done it. His glorious relationship with Gianpaolo Pazzini at Sampdoria surely indicates he can put the last few years behind him and look to a future among Europe's eilte. Perhaps once the Sampdoria adventure is over (Heres hoping it could be as glorious as the early 90's ), a stint leading Juve to their first post scandal Scudetto with Pazzini in tow? Oh God. The thought of Cassano-Pazzini-Diego-Giovinco-Chielini-Aged Buffon-Cameos from Del Pel would be so so so beautifully, amazingly rad. It would cost like 25 - 30 million to prize those two away from Samp? I will gladly buy Fiats for the rest of my life if you could make this happen Juve. Seriously.

But back to the point in hand. Cassano's dark days at Madrid are summed up best by a bit of Wikipedia vandalism;

''Continuing reports of his erratic and anti-social attitude, his expanding waistline, due to a weakness for chocolate, cakes and more cakes, as well as soft drinks, beer, sweets and pies, led in May 2006 to Madrid fining him for every gram he remains overweight''. Check the source

Makes you realise what a ginormous risk Samp were taking. Huuuuge. But by God did it pay of. The old Cassano is back. Yes, so there is still the occasional clothes off tantrum but it is more than offset by the influence Fantonio had on this super loveable Sampdoria side. And to be fair, that Torino player went straight for the neck. That is going to make anyone angry. But yeah, it is nice to think that Mr Cassano feels at home in a team that is down the local Ristorante after every game. That is the way it should be. The fact that Mr Cassano is in a team currently second in Serie A surely indicates a call up is in order. That too, is how it should be.

So over to you Marcelo, why no call up? It is seems like a repeat of the Baggio-Trapatoni farce of 2002, and we all know how that ended. Cassano and Pazzini are the best strikeforce in Serie A since the dawn of 2009, both are italian and neither are in the Azzurri set up. So Di Natale is on fire and Gilardino scored last night, but Iaquinta could be sacrificed for one of these two, at least for two games where one point was needed. Italy have a wealth of options going into South Africa, but I am sure that leaving Cassano at home would be a mistake